About the lack of time

My office recently shifted closer home, which cut my morning travel with Zack. Earlier, both our offices were 15km from home, and we used to go together and sometimes come back together. On the way back we used to shop some home essentials or catch the hot masala dosa at the eatery. Riding in the pillion seat, I used toΒ continuously yap about the beautiful weather, the snarling traffic, the occasional funny movie poster or what-happened-office today stories. So in a day, Β I used to spend at least 6 to 7 hours with him.

In 2 weeks, two things happened. And both not compatible to each other, though pretty good in their own stead.

First the office shift. Now the distance is under 5 km. It hardly takes me 15 min to reach the office. Earlier I used to spend 2 hours in the evening traffic to reach home. Anyone living in Bangalore can vouch for the fact that traffic takes away whatever energy you have after slogging in the office. Now a days, since I reach home in less than 30 min even in rush hour traffic, it has given me new hours at my disposal, which has me wondering how to utilize it at the best.

Second, the project which Zack has been working in office has become more taxing and demanding than ever. Even when he is home, he is researching on it and thinking about new ways to improve the performance of his codes. He leaves home by 9 and returns by 10 or 11. On days he is home by 9, he works till 12. Sometimes, he is so much focused into the computer screen, that he is oblivious to the stares of his wife. While his boss is supremely happy with him, I just wish he could give Zack some time and work off at least when he reaches home early. On the rare cases when he has no pending issues to be solved, my workaholic hubby will try to learn something or watch some technical videos online.

These days, we hardly interact with each other. He is so dead tired that he snoozes off soon after the dinner.

I have devised a way to ‘make’ some ‘us’ time.

I write him emails. Long ones. Whatever I want to talk I write.

He reads and replies “Ok” or “Yes”

I am happy πŸ™‚

 

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44 thoughts on “About the lack of time

  1. E-mails are nice but just a β€˜yes’ or β€˜ok’ in reply? Guess he is really tied up ! Wishing you a good happy happy free-wala weekend !!! πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

  2. One benefit in it, traveling time reduced.. don’t worry the project will be over soon but I really like the idea of emails.. πŸ™‚

  3. I wonder.. if I will ever stop saying – “Vishaaaaa… This has been the case with me too, we are exactly the same” πŸ˜› πŸ˜€ You just spoke my mind.. This has been how we are for the past two months.. even his weekends are spent in office or office work… On week days its even horrible.. I dont even feel him home as he immediately gets back to stare his laptop and gets transported to a different world. Even on days we both are dead tired, he sneaks out after I have fallen asleep to continue his work 😦 Until March or early April was my turn and now his. I have this feeling that we both are racing with time which is just flying.. I feel like we both are not getting that “us” time by the way our professional lives are taking us 😦

    *same pinch again* I write long emails and when see a word of reply.. I am happy too πŸ™‚

    Hugs dear.. more hugs..

    • At least I have one person who will know exactly how it sucks when your partner is a workaholic…sailing in the same boat GB πŸ˜‰

      During weekends, I have to literally snatch the laptop from him to spend some time not just with me, but the family too.

      Hehe..I see email as a good outlet…glad to know I am not the only one πŸ˜‰

      Hugs GB πŸ™‚

  4. Nice e-mailing strategy! It’s always best to find a way around such issues because they will creep up when you have a workaholic husband. Mine is one too. πŸ˜€ It comes and goes in phases for me. So there are times when I see too much of him and there are times when I just don’t get to see him at all. I like your positiveness!

  5. Hugs to you Visha….you are really very romantic, writing mails to communicate regularaly…now, how romantic is that πŸ™‚
    Hope Zack gets some off time from work and you again get to enjoy the togetherness….

  6. Ah! You win some you lose some. Fret not, think about long term i.e. whenever his project finishes and he has all the time in this world to come on time and you will feel happier πŸ™‚

    • Welcome Smita πŸ™‚

      Yes, its both win and a loss situation. Till the end of this year he will be neck deep into his work, as you said, waiting for his project to finish πŸ˜‰

  7. πŸ™‚ Visha, love your positivity there ! It is a great idea.
    During K’s and my courtship days, we used to email each other a lot. So it is so special for us that sometimes we still email between work πŸ™‚ It is a super romantic phase and you will read those emails more than once πŸ™‚
    I hope the project does get cleared by year end positively and you have Zack and the email stack ! πŸ™‚

    • Toffee πŸ™‚
      Thats so cute of both of u and K.

      We used to be on messenger before marriage, but since chat is not allowed at his work place, we resorted to emails.

      Hehe…havent I told u, Zack is an unromantic as u can imagine. Going thru a backlog of 6 month’s emails??? That is not possible dear πŸ™‚

      Thanks for the wishes re

  8. Hope things better for you both soon.
    As far writing e-mails…I too have used this trick, but trust me there’ll be times when those e-mails will get read with a pre-occupied mind. But worry not everything will get to normal as soon the project ends.
    Hoping for the project to end soon πŸ™‚

  9. Visha, First time commenting though have been visiting your blog for a few months now..You are such an optimist yaar..Even I do write mails, when I feel that the husband is neck deep at work.., but I write only when something irritates me..(: Your post is a reminder that I could send him a mail in normal mood too πŸ™‚
    Dont ya worry, this is a phase and will end sooon…

    • Welcome Ramya πŸ™‚

      Earlier, even I thought I should write only if something important needs to be told, then I felt everyday emails are also fun. In major cases, I write so that I do not forget.

      Thanks for the wishes πŸ™‚

  10. ohh!! Hugs!
    I hope Zack’s crazy hours are cut back soon!
    its good to live close by your office in Blore na?! I never had that opportunity! 😐
    Maybe after coming back? I hope we live closer to where I might end up working…

    • Definitely having the office closer home is so relaxing. From 15km its 5 now, giving me 2 hours more than usual.

      Wish you get a office nearby your place when you come back Pixie πŸ™‚

  11. I go through it in a different way. What with Mint being supremely busy and over burdened with his course work on campus, I often find it easier to write him long mails than to coordinate time and talk on phone. He usually replies with an “Okay” or “Yes” too. Just that I keep getting mad at him.

    I hope Zack is freed from this kind of stress soon!

  12. Awww! That is such a cute post πŸ™‚
    Hope Zack gets at least a bit of free time soon πŸ™‚
    And I love the idea of writing long mails πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

  13. There is this friend. When she is not able to say something and saying it really important.

    She writes in emails.

    I must say, it is bliss to read them.

    Its enrichment for relation.

    • Could not think of anything else Scribby…but I see even that is not working…he has not replied with the usual ‘OK’ for the last 2 emails πŸ‘Ώ

  14. We had the same happen to us recently, since we moved closer to work, and this was like from 25kms away now we are 2 kms away! So no drive time. The Dude was actually complaining about lack of time to talk πŸ™‚ esp when he is home, Zo is asleep, and we cant disturb her too.
    But no mails, atleast you get a reply, i doubt I would get those too 😐 you are a content person to be ok with the mom syllables though πŸ˜‰

    • The drive time is the perfect time to ‘catch-up’ no πŸ™‚

      These day the replies are intermittent, I wonder what could be so important that cant even reply with ‘Ok’
      But then again, I cant do anything else no πŸ˜‰

  15. Reduced travelling time is bliss, Visha, especially in Bangalore. But, yes, I understand how it can cut down on travel time together with the hubby.

    Can I say same story here too? The OH and I used to travel together to work and back home, when I was working at my earlier office. Now, I have started working from home as the horrible commute was affecting my health. It has cut down our time together drastically, but at least we are at peace now. We are able to eat home-cooked food and able to sleep and wake up at sane hours.

    • I do get to benefit from the extra time now, but for how long can you watch TV and read books, when at the end of a hard day at office, all you want is some peaceful relaxing moments with your partner..

      Oh dear…glad that you are able to take care of your health and have ghar-ka-khana πŸ™‚

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