Clash lack

One thought is bothering me for a long time. Especially when I observe other couples around me, amongst friends and family having disagreements with each other, rising decibel levels when they talk, lowered patience levels and to sum it all, having fights.

We never fight.
And I do not know if it is good or bad 😐

I have read many articles* which say fighting couples are in a healthy relationship. The difference of opinion brings them closer. The kinds.

But the most we ‘fight’ is not talk with each other. How is the problem or issue sorted out?One gives in by the way of explaining things calmly while the other listens patiently. The night passes. Morning everything is forgotten and forgiven. And we move on. Bad words and swearing never occur, nor do name-calling.Β  Shouting at each other will not happen in this lifetime because its loudness makes me cringe.

This morning when we were stuck up at the traffic jam, I was mentioning to Zack how come we never fight with each other, unlike other usual couples. Immediately he said, “But you cried your eyes out two weeks ago”. “Yeah, but it was not your fault”, I shot back. The guy becomes all smug now.”So I am the model husband who never fights with the wife”. “Because you have a very non-confrontational wife”, I explained :mrgreen:

So it comes down to this – is it normal amongst guys never to fight or is it me who is having a dysfunctional relationship with the partner πŸ™„ πŸ™„

*Few links here, here and here

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28 thoughts on “Clash lack

  1. We never fight either. I think it’s normal. No two relationships are alike. For some fighting brings them closer, for others it’s not necessary. You are just being paranoid for no reason πŸ™‚

    • For this reason only I discussed it here, its reassuring to know we are not the only weird ones out there πŸ˜›

      Welcome to my space πŸ™‚

  2. I dont see it as weird at all. Its nice not to have fights too, and again the conflicting thoughts shouldnt be boiling inside and neither of us fight it out – it shouldnt be that. As you guys silently deal with it, I guess its good.

    I fight with S, we have arguments and I love it. I really love it πŸ˜€ hehe I know I am weird!

  3. I feel the same way! Whenever we have a disagreement we either just don’t talk to each other or just talk it out the morning after. I don’t like confrontation either, it makes me very uneasy. I guess that’s why we don’t scream and shout. Maybe “normal’ relationship is a very fine line. :/

  4. We do fight, but in a civilized way πŸ™„ I mean no raising voices or shaking fists. Usually if he does something that I didn’t like, I withdraw from all sorts of conversations for sometime, sulk and let the husband do tricks like a Jhamoorah to make me smile. If I am the one to ruffle his feathers, it depends entirely upon my hormones at that particular time. 😳 But we do have a rule that we will not go to sleep without resolving any differences that comes between us. πŸ˜›

    • and who might he be inspired from to learn jhamoorah tricks πŸ™„ πŸ™„ πŸ˜›

      so I am already implementing guru-ma’s techniques *exults*

  5. my hubby tries to settle things if we have a fight on the same day itself. He hates it to have it prolonged as i keep very silent. He even apologies to me even if it is my mistake πŸ˜‰

  6. i am never married and i seriously know anything about married couples. But i had an interesting situation.
    If you have posted this a month ago, i would have definitely said to you..”oh visha, donn feel bad. some of us are just made that way. we cannot fight loud. Silence is our only weapon and that is totally natural…and all blah blah”
    But now, with my life is taking such interesting turns, i feel guilty for being loud & in a fighting mode all the time. so now i would say, It is just not about us, it is also about the other persons thoughts and actions and the situations that make things worse.
    You are really lucky to have zack who is just the same as you are.
    I agree with one of your commentators..every relationship is different. Just enjoy the joy of being in such a beautiful n comfortable relationship.

  7. lol!!! U r crazy to even write about this. Arrey every couple is different and if u don’t u don’t fight simple! why contemplate about it? Will they pay you for proving their research right kya? Nahin na? So take a chill pill baby πŸ˜›

  8. This sounds so much like the OH and me. We are exactly this way. I think it is normal to be this way – name calling and partner bashing is not the right way out. Listening to the other person’s viewpoint calmly and finding out a middle route is the way to go about an issue, we think.

  9. People vary. That’s about it. I fight with my guy always but he never does πŸ˜› The max he will do is ask me to call back when I am thinking clearly. It is just our way of expression πŸ™‚

    • Fights are good too. I see it around me. Just because it does not happen with us, it left me wondering if we are not mental πŸ˜› πŸ˜›

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