Tech-ache

With the advent of numerous devices to stay constantly connected to the virtual world, it has drastically reduced the couple time between us. The other times when we could have spent quality time together invariably end up with discussions of the daughter – what she did, her latest tantrums, etc..etc.. It is not quite uncommon for us to exchange WhatsApp chats like “Has the dragon slept?” even when we are a room apart. Zack comes in home at 9:30 and Moo vehemently refuses to go to sleep unless she had her fair share of daddy time. By the time she falls asleep which is around 11, Zack goes neck deep in his laptop in the melee of catching up with news, movies and when not doing all of these things – WhatsApp-ing. His office has such an internet policy which debars him from using social media and basically accessing all things which can be classified under time-pass.

Before we owned the laptop and internet at home, we used to do stuff together- like talk about what happened at work, who got hitched, good vacation spots, family functions..you get the drift. But that was the time before we had Moo. With her arrival, the equations have changed completely. There is a lot more me-time than us-time. From the time Moo wakes up, Zack looks after her till he leaves for work – making her eat breakfast, taking her for walks, putting her to sleep and playing with her. During that time, I finish the household work, cooking, cleaning and sit down for some time reading the newspapers. At night, when I am done with all the work and ready to make the little dragon go to sleep, he leaves us two to ourselves. I cherish this period which I spend with Moo. I (try to) tell her stories, play peekaboo, sing lullabies and finally when she is tired, she comes to me and sleeps on my lap. I am half asleep by the time all the lights are switched off. I was not this tired at the end of the day when Moo was still an infant. Once she started walking, there is not a place which has been undiscovered by her, which does not involve pulling things and throwing them all around, eating and putting all things in mouth except her food, squealing and running away from me when I find her holding something which is not her toy and I admit it tires me out completely at the end of the day. When I speak about the lack of spending time with Zack, he in his zen mode states – “You should rest when she rests.”

So what I think is if we had no smartphones, laptops, basically no internet, we would find at least some time for ourselves. Thank God for weekends, were we go out together for walks or I would have resorted to changing the internet password 👿 😈

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Wedding outtakes

  • The bride was the cynosure of all eyes, but I observed the thayir vada stole the show 😛
  • The amount of time your saree will remain prim and proper is directly proportional to the crankiness level of your infant.
  • You will be admonished on being ‘on diet‘ even if you are eating six meals a day, plus assorted snacks and juices.
  • The only accessory you can carry to the wedding venue is your baby bag – what? why do you need a purse or phone.
  • The baby will fall asleep not during the loud music show, or while meeting the hoards of relatives but only when it is time for you to step on to the stage to wish the couple.
  • When finally, finally you get the time to sit and cherish the awesome gulab jamun one last time, the baby will create a ruckus to go home.

On being a mom

“You already know how to raise a baby. The only new thing for you is giving birth to one”, said one of my sisters-in-law, when a pregnant me was cajoling with her kid. Though shocked, I laughed it off and proceeded to play with my nephew. Seeing him, I reminisced, how I had held him four hours after his birth and took care of him for two days, when his mom was resting after an operation. Later that night, I shared this incident with Zack, he smiled and said lets see whats in store for us. You will be an awesome mom, he assured, you are so natural with kids.

With Moo, I have had some new experiences and observations, which nobody told me, nor did I read about it anywhere.

  • Just borns are not exactly very cute-sy. It takes some time for all the features to develop and gain shape. Moo had a very interesting case. Her left eye was smaller than her right, making her look non-human most of the times. She had a very large forehead with zero hair on her head. It took two to three months for her to stop resembling like a bald monkey and get all aww + oohworthy.
  • Routine is more important than schedule. No use of downloading or noting the feeding and play chart from the internet or the pediatric, the baby will eat when hungry and sleep when tired. I had this habit of putting her to sleep at 8pm when she was four months old, which is the recommended age for getting babies into a daily schedule. She followed it for two weeks or so, then third week onward started howling and screeching when placed into her cradle. Gradually, she understood that after clothes-change and feed, its time to go to sleep.
  • Your sleep is gone, until your kid goes to college.
  • Patience is a virtue, but when you become a mom, it becomes a necessity. They wake up at 2am, when you are so very sleepy, your eyes are refusing to open, but they want to play or simply stare at you. You have to patiently wait till they get tired and calculate the minutes as to when the wide eyed dragon will finally start lolling and you can flop back into the bed.
  • Babies take time to know you.Moo never even looked at me until she was four months old, let alone smile. I used to long for her to smile at me, but she would squeal and laugh at the WALL instead.
  • Now this may work for some, or it may not for others. But in my experience, putting on Vicks Vaporub on Moo’s feet and then putting on socks always ensured she stayed warm throughout cool nights.
  • Making baby food and feeding Moo separately does not work. We have to make her eat along with us, when we are having our foods.

And the learning’s are still in progress 🙂