Bleak

I feel like I am living in a bubble. A giant one at that. Every time I browse social media it’s like reading about a different world all together. The sheer magnitude of the pandemic in its second wave in India is so far from how peacefully we are leading our daily lives. I don’t feel like talking about my everyday mundane life. Just not feeling like it. Please hug your loved ones and say an extra prayer for all those who are battling out there.

In today’s happenings

One of those Saturdays when we have been out from morning till night.

Temple visit.

A birthday party in the neighbourhood.

A birthday party in previous neighbourhood.

Prep for Bulky waste collection by council.

House is a mess but a lot emptier. We put out a mattress, broken or rusted utensils, Moo’s doll house, a clothes rack, old furniture and bulky knick knacks for council cleanup which will be picked up for recycling or dumping tomorrow. As a family we have really caught up with minimalism and liking the ‘less is more’ concept. Less stuff to maintain, more time to enjoy life. We have created some empty spaces now which is making the rooms look bigger.

News these days is so depressing. The rising covid cases in India paints a scary picture. What a big loss is Actor Vivek’s passing away 😩 I have laughed out loud in so many of his comedies, such a legend 😢

Of comfort zones

As kids we want to try out anything new we hear or see. The thrill of discovering and forgetting it soon enough to discovering another new interesting thing to do/ learn and so on it goes. Enter teenage life and the experimentation starts – old enough to rebel but still young enough to ask support. Adulthood beckons and all the gyaan we accumulated over the years is ripe to be spent and we learn to adapt and adopt to live a life which to a certain extent fulfils is with contentment. Is that area known as the comfort zone where we are afraid to try anything new? Do something which we never did before? Because we know the repercussions if we go against the flow we get cold feet when the time comes.

I am very non confrontational by nature. In fact I am the mediator when things get worse and I call truce amongst our family friends. If I know someone is doing wrong to me, I won’t say it to their face, just because I don’t want to hurt anyone or lose a friendship. While in my head it sounded all good, somewhere I was feeling a nagging. My mind would play hundreds of scenarios of what ifs but nothing would come out of my mouth. My comfort zone no longer made me happy.

I started getting comfortable being out of my comfort zone slowly. I started telling things the way they sounded in my head and accepted the broken friendships happily. The lightness in my heart outweighed the heaviness in the shocked faces of people because they never expected it from me. I learnt to say No and be firm. I learnt to respectfully say ‘what you did was not right’ and break off the conversation.

I hardly have anyone who I can call my best friend save my college BFF because I do not mince my words and everyone wants to hear they are right. When abroad you want to have a social circle but try as I might I haven’t clicked with any. I used to feel quite lonely in the beginning of this ‘speak your mind’ journey and berated myself quite a number of times as to why I didn’t stop faking it.

But that’s the beauty of stepping out of your comfort zone. Once you are out and taste the freedom, you don’t want it any other way. Inner peace is a true feeling you guys 🤩

Speaking of this stepping out topic, two years ago I adopted a new thing which radically changed my life. On two minds whether it will be TMI if I share here 🧐 I have seen people vlogging it though so I might as well write about it tomorrow.